The 5 most memorable places I’ve cried at work, ranked
All I’m saying is that nobody ever gave Andrea enough credit for never crying in front of Miranda Priestly. If you think about it, the only time she ever broke down in the Runway office was to Nigel after shoving that cold plate of Smith and Wollensky steak into the kitchen sink. Totally valid.
To be honest, I don’t know how she did it. How did she hold it together with all those coats being flung on her desk, coffee runs, and don’t even get me started on that Harry Potter manuscript. Best scene in the movie if you ask me. My job may not be as stressful as hers, but periods in messages from my manager send me into a full blown spiral and the smallest feedback piece of feedback can sometimes keep me up at night.
Like Andy, I’ve experienced a good cry in the office about some of these things, and more. But unlike Andy, it’s happened way more than just once. I used to feel bad about it, ashamed even. My inner voice would yell at me to calm down, blink up at the white, stark hospital-style lighting, and just hold it together. But recently, my coworker sent me this tweet which changed the game:
Image Credit: @wokkax3
Now crying at work feels good. Dare I say, powerful?
1 week has passed since my last sob, and I’m now ready to take a trip down memory lane and rank the 5 most memorable places I’ve cried in my very open floor plan, 6th Avenue, NYC office: favorite to least favorite.
Bathroom (9/10)
So much can be done privately in the bathroom: browse social media, hide from your co-workers, cry. The best part is that you can do any of these things for as long as you want because unless they want an HR ticket, nobody can say you took too long.
Bathrooms are also a one-stop-shop taking you from crying, to calm, to carry on. While I don’t condone killing trees, pressing cold paper towels under your eyes can help depuff and turn them back to white, or at least a very light pink. Pro-tip.
The one point lost goes to that not-so-tiny divider between stalls that never fails to strip me of all my privacy bringing me to my next point. The last stall is always the best because nobody will ever pass by. I will never not stand by that statement.
While I don’t condone killing trees, pressing cold paper towels under your eyes can help depuff and turn them back to white, or at least a very light pink.
Supply Closet (7/10)
Most people overlook the supply closet which makes it a prime crying location. It’s vacant for most of the day because staff usually visit at specific hours of the day to perform specific tasks: clean the kitchen, restock the snacks, or replace the paper napkins. So, if you memorize those cleaning sheets posted on the bathroom door, there’s a high likelihood you can cry there for hours with no interruption.
If you’re anxious like me, you may not be able to have a good cry out of fear someone may forget the schedule and burst in looking for the box of Fritos. Or, you may spend all your time thinking about how to exit as nonchalantly as you can as someone hiding in a supply closet. It’s the social anxiety for me!
So, if you memorize those cleaning sheets posted on the bathroom door, there’s a high likelihood you can cry there for hours with no interruption.
Desk (4/10)
Gone are the days of cubicles thanks to the massive communal tables we now call desks. It’s a very positive experience when you’re feeling mentally stable. Spy on your colleague's laptop, gossip behind computer screens, small talk from across the table. Unfortunately, the intimate nature of these work spaces makes it impossible to cry without every single person at the table knowing. And it’ll only exacerbate your social anxiety knowing they’re probably talking about you while you’re in the bathroom. And just by nature of being at the same table, you’ll have to explain yourself, or laugh at yourself, when you inevitably return to a full table of pity looks, or stares.
If you have a good team, returning may feel like a warm hug and words of encouragement may be spoken. Or maybe just a soft smile. In corporate America, that may as well be a hug. If your team sucks, then I don’t recommend coming back to the table. Disappear for as long as you can and return when you're certain they’re all gone. It’s called survival.
If you have a good team, returning may feel like a warm hug and words of encouragement may be spoken. Or maybe just a soft smile. In corporate America, that may as well be a hug.
Closed Office (2/10)
If a senior member of your team has a private office, chances are you’ll have a meeting there often. For the most part, the chairs in there will probably be more comfortable than what you’ve been sitting on all day, and it’s likely to be at least 15 degrees warmer than the normal office freeze.
If you ever find yourself crying in there, tough luck. If I were you, I would spend all my energy worrying about how I’m going to leave without being noticed. Why? People are nosey and their ears were probably perking up the minute you stepped foot into that office. They’re curious to know what’s happening, but won’t be able to find out, so wait until the meeting is over so they can construct a story about what happened based on the vibe of the person leaving the room.
Put your head down, and walk as fast as you can in one direction before anyone calls out your name.
They’re curious to know what’s happening, but won’t be able to find out, so wait until the meeting is over so they can construct a story about what happened based on the vibe of the person leaving the room.
Lunch Line (0/10)
Timing is everything in life. That is, until it’s noon on a Monday, you didn’t beat the lunch rush, and you're stuck in line between your manager and nosey co-worker trying not to make eye contact as tears stream down your face.
Let’s start with the obvious: it’s the most public place possible, and, therefore, extremely humiliating. Besides that, people may find you a buzz kill, ruining the precious time people have to forget about their work and remember the joy in their life.
All I can say here is make sure the communal tongs aren’t wet from your tears and hand them off to the person behind you as fast as possible like a baton in the olympics. And then get lost.
